Being mum: to twin toddlers (15m-18m)

Now the girls are 18 months old I consider them properly toddlers! Since my last update they have really honed their skills at walking. They are both able to walk extremely confidently now and sometimes we are able to leave the buggy in the car and just let them walk. However they are still quite slow and they don’t listen to instructions so it can be difficult letting them walk when I’m on my own with them. I tend to put them in the buggy and only let them walk when there’s plenty of space and they can’t hurt themselves! They don’t enjoy being in the buggy and just want to walk everywhere so it can be more difficult and stressful taking them out!

They are also absolutely amazing at speech now. They learn new words every single day and constantly make my heart melt with the cute little pronunciation they have! They understand a lot of instructions as well and I can tell them to do things, whether they do it is another matter!

In the past few months we have also started to do a lot more play groups and generally make more friends. I can’t say the girls are particularly friendly because they really don’t like sharing! But it’s nice having new friends nonetheless.

Friendship is the word I would use to sum up this stage with the girls. Not about others though. No, my friendship with the girls has really truly blossomed. We are so close now and I really feel like our family is becoming such a lovely unit that’s getting knitted stronger each day. The girls are both mummy’s girls which can be difficult and sad for Josh but I know it’s just a phase. They won’t always favour me so I’m going to enjoy every moment as much as I can!

DOTTY IS 18 MONTHS OLD ❤ what a difference the last 3 months have made. Dotty is now walking with confidence and climbing everything in sight. She is a very confident little soul and is happy around new people and new surroundings. She still absolutely adores all cuddly toys- they are her absolute favourite! She also loves water, especially splashing in puddles. She will spot a puddle from a mile off and take a huge detour to splash in it! A true older sister she’s the leader and the initiator of mischief. She also has a very bad temper and scratches, bites, hits and kicks a LOT! Her vocabulary has got so good and she is really good at pronouncing the whole word rather than just the first sound. Her favourite word is “wow” – Dotty we adore you so much! Happy half birthday x x

Margot is 18 months today! She is definitely the more shy of the two and finds new people and situations quite overwhelming. She often looks a bit serious but once she knows you she is so silly and fun! She loves chatting and is constantly walking around jabbering away to herself! She copies everything Dotty does and has also started copying actions and facial expressions of people on the tv. She’s very helpful and enjoys tidying things away, she is also very kind and sensitive and if Dotty is crying she always brings her her dummy or toy monkey. She has started to string sentences together normally including ‘all gone’ (or as she says gogone) she’s really good at following instructions and remembering what she has to do in certain situations. She is still the bigger twin and loves her food… She is hard work on a day out and loves doing the actions to “head, shoulders, knees and toes” . We love you so much Margot, happy half birthday baby! X x x

Being mum: 12-15 months

So next up in my being mum series is 12-15 months. The girls have just turned 15 months so this post is going to be all about what it has been like since they turned 1!

First of all, the girls have learnt so much since they’ve turned 1. I know we think that pretty much ever month but seriously in this time period I have been so surprised at how much they’ve changed. They’re like little sponges and are constantly learning new things. First of all, their movement has changed a lot. At 12 months they were crawling but now they are both walking. Margot is fantastic at walking and never crawls at all anymore whereas Dotty is much slower and still very wobbly, at this point she can only take a few steps but she is getting there! They love climbing and getting up to all sorts of mischief. Their speech has also come on in leaps and bounds, Margot in particular can say 20+ words now and is very confident when chatting. Dotty is also very good at talking but she is a lot more quiet and whispery, she only speaks if SHE wants to not if anyone else tells her to! They understand so much of what I say to them now and communicate if they are tired, hungry or need their nappy changed. At this stage they have also learnt to play much more on their own which has been fantastic for me in a lot of ways because it means I can get on with other things. However, as they like to get up to mischief it can be very difficult to leave them to it for too long! I always think each stage is my favourite stage but I really am loving the stage they are in right now – they are just so much fun and such a joy to be around! That being said, we are starting to see a lot more tantrums creep in! If things don’t go their way they can get very frustrated and angry but they don’t really respond to discipline so that is an issue!!

Normally I post the girls monthly updates on these posts but when they reached 12 months we didn’t carry on writing their updates monthly on Instagram. Instead we have decided to do them every three months so I will post their updates from 12 months and 15 months.

This month Dotty has come on in leaps and bounds. She’s now crawling and pulling herself up on furniture and she’s quite speedy when she wants to be! She’s not the most chatty baby but she sometimes randomly starts screaming with joy as loud as she can! She’s a real book worm and absolutely loves reading. We have woken up some mornings and found her flicking through a book! She’s getting good at responding to things you say, if you ask her where her head, tummy and feet are she’ll pat them!
She’s also learnt to cuddle by putting her head on you and saying “aaaahhh”. She so loves giving kisses but decides that she kisses with tongues and always tries to snog you! Sometimes when she has to be woken up from a sleep she gets startled and starts clapping, it’s so funny! She’s still a chilled baby but she does have a fiery temper and gets cross easily!
It’s been an absolute delight watching Dotty grow & develop this year and we have loved every minute! ❤

This month Margot has got a lot faster at crawling and is pulling herself up on furniture, legs, walls and anything she can find! She’s also started cruising and moving that way and loves being helped to walk by holding her hands. She’s also learnt where her head, tummy and feet are and she’s learnt what the word “bounce” means too! She definitely tries to communicate a lot and will point at things and say “ook”. She also tries to say Fred which just shows how much she absolutely loves animals. If she sees an animal on TV she’ll stare for ages! She loves pressing her face against our glass doors and looking out and she’s very affectionate and loves giving cuddles and kisses. She’s become a lot more happy to play independently with her new found confidence from crawling!
Margot is such a sweetheart and we have over watching her grow up this past year! ❤

15 MONTHS OLD! Dotty is a passionate little fireball! She has the most sweet nature but when something doesn’t go her way, boy do you know it! She gets angry and bites or swipes at whatever is closest be that object, person or herself! She has long hair which has to be clipped back and she has lots of big teeth at the back. She’s a very fussy eater and would rather go hungry than eat something she doesn’t want! She spends the first 5 minutes of any meal deconstructing every item by poking it with her index finger until she deems it’s suitability. She’s started getting good at using a spoon but will get bored quickly. She’s not the best at sleeping and can take up to an hour to get to sleep! She can stand for quite a while if we put her in the position but she still doesn’t walk. She has the ability but doesn’t seem to want to… She either makes her legs go floppy or will lunge forward rather than taking a step. She absolutely loves climbing and will stand on top of anything and everything. She’s still an avid reader and she also enjoys problem solving toys. She’s getting a very good vocabulary but she’s fairly quiet and only talks when she’s in the right mood. She’s a mummy’s girl and is extremely cuddly and is happy to snuggle on the sofa. She’s still miss independent and is happy to play alone and ditches mummy at every baby group! She’s a true delight ❤❤❤

MARGOT AT 15 MONTHS! Margot took her first steps around 6 weeks a go and is now extremely confident at walking. She barely crawls at all anymore. She hates being in her pushchair for that reason! She loves being read to and brings books over to you and sits on your knee! She has a fantastic vocabulary of 20 words+ and can recognise animals and make their sounds. She especially loves tigers and elephants at the moment! She has also learnt to say “poo poo” when she’s filled her nappy! She enjoys pulling funny faces and laughing about it. She’s great at mimicking facial expressions too! She also loves giving cuddles and kisses and waving at people out and about! She loves to say “shoes” and bring your shoes over to you and today she got measured for her first big girl hard sole shoes! She’s still lacking in hair but has lots of teeth and a big pot belly! She’s very calm and chilled out for the most part and still loves her sleep and can nap for ages! She loves pretending to talk on the phone and giving her reflection kisses! Margot you are wonderful ❤❤

Thanks for reading

Kate-Sig-1

Being mum: 9-11 months

Hey everyone, I want to carry this series on but I just never found the time to do this age… so I’m just going to copy and paste their monthly Instagram post and make sure I do it properly next time!

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HAPPY 10 MONTHS DOTTY! Only 2 months away from 1!!! Sob!
This month Dots has mastered the art of clapping and she claps all the time! She’s not quite there with waving but often waves both hands in the air at once! She’s always getting up to mischief and rolling her way over to different places especially the fire place! Her favourite thing to find is power chords 😳. She has cut 2 new top teeth which brings her total to 4! Her hair is coming in thicker and she loves to hold your hands and be helped to walk around the room! She can be very fast! She still loves her water and eating lots of food including a new favourite, strawberries 🍓. She now weighs 17lb 13oz and is a dainty little thing sitting on the 25th centile. She is getting much better at sleeping and is getting in to more of a routine with her naps. She still isn’t crawling but it won’t be long now, she gets very frustrated that she can’t! She’s still very friendly and loves to charm anyone she meets! Love you Dotty Lou!68514248442db5bc74a56797e4ee0191c4c0d63a5188900d1aea2e4d02b0c263482f5b59

Margot is 10 months old!
This month Margot has become a lot more vocal, she’s constantly jabbering! She has learnt to repeat sounds such as kissy noises, raspberries and clicking her tongue on the roof of her mouth. She is extremely close to crawling and will get up on to her knees but is not quite there yet! She’s constantly rolling around her cot and we always find them both in completely random positions! She also attempts to pull herself up on things and loves standing up against the furniture. At her last weigh in she was a bit of a chunk at 19lb 13oz and is now on the 75th centile! Her hair is growing a lot and soon you may actually be able to see it on photos! She’s always been a really good sleeper but now she is developing a bit of separation anxiety which means she cries a lot at bed time! We love you Margot!!

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11 MONTHS OLD! (Yesterday)! Our babies are less than one month from being a YEAR!
Dotty has turned in to a little firecracker this month – she is a very chilled out and happy baby but she definitely has a bit of a temper and can bite on purpose and get very, very cross when things don’t go her way. She’s definitely not as meek & mild as she first comes across! She really enjoys talking and has a funny little whispery language that she uses. She almost always has her mouth open and is really smiley. She has got the cutest little top teeth with a gap that give the sweetest little smile. She is a really slow eater and if she’s not careful Margot gobbles all her food! She loves to try and get down by herself off the sofa and roll around to get toys. She went to the beach for the first time and kept trying to eat sand and stones. She’s confident and not really scared of anything, she’s a thrill seeker and is not phased by animals or people. She’s warming up to Margot and doesn’t cry every time she touches her anymore! She hates it when Daddy sneezes for some reason she bursts in to tears every time! She’s getting to grips with waving but is still not on the move yet! We can’t wait to see what the next month brings!

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MARGOT IS 11 MONTHS! The big news this month is that she’s learnt to crawl, though she’s not content with this and is constantly in the downward dog position trying to stand up. She can pull herself up on furniture now too. She has also learnt to clap which she loves showing off at every occasion! She may be bigger but she’s not braver, our girl is very cautious and wary of most everything the world has to offer. She was terrified of Fred the dog at first but now she won’t leave him or Alfie the cat alone! She’s a nature lover and is constantly eating leaves, mud and grass! She shovels food in to her mouth as quickly as anything and most of the time she doesn’t stop to chew! She has learnt how to growl recently and does it even to strangers! We think she sounds like something from the Walking Dead! She cries every time her grandma takes her glasses off and she’s very clingy to mummy still. Although daddy is her favourite play mate!
Exciting times ahead for you little one!

 

Kate-Sig-1

Motherhood, one year on

Just over a year a go I became a mum to twins. In December 2015 I found out I was pregnant and it was totally unplanned, in fact it was something I really didn’t want at that time in my life. So now, after a year’s experience of motherhood under my belt, how do I really feel about it?

People may expect me to say that I wouldn’t change a thing, I’m so glad everything worked out the way it did. And whilst that’s true to an extent… there is still a lot I would change. I believe that everything happens for a reason, that ultimately, the life of my two daughters was planned and purposed by God. But that doesn’t mean that I get why right now. I kinda thought that once I had the girls there would be this “ohhh” moment where suddenly it all clicked and I realised why God had chosen now to bless me with these two precious people but in all honesty I still don’t know. I wouldn’t change Dorothy and Margot for absolutely anything, they are completely perfect. But the timing? Yes, that I would still change. In my worldly view I ask myself why. Why now? Why not at a time when I had more money, not at university, a few more years of marriage under my belt. Why not at a time when I’m a bit older and not always the youngest mum in the room. Why not at a time when my siblings have children and my babies can grow up with their cousins.

But I choose to have faith, I choose to believe that the reason why will become clear to me with time. Maybe that’s in a few months or twenty years, I don’t know. I trust in God’s timing above anything.

Motherhood suits me, though. I actually love it more than I ever thought possible. Out of everything in my life I ever thought I’d be good at, being a mum was never one of them. But I have actually surprised myself so much, the way I love my babies is so fierce, so selfless, so tireless. I could literally endure anything for them and I never knew I could feel like that. I never knew I could deny myself again and again, I never knew I could be this patient and constant. In a strange way they have given me a new found confidence in myself and who I am just by being their mum. I feel stronger and more content in myself than I ever have done. 

I recently got accepted on to an MA at a university. Unfortunately I had to give it up for now because I couldn’t get childcare sorted… I felt like I had lost so much when I gave that up but over the last few weeks I have realised that I’venot lost anything but gained everything. I am my children’s main carer and influence and if that means I can’t start a career til I’m 27 then how much have I actually lost?! I have given a few short years of my life to my children to shape their future and I can’t see anything negative about that.

So what’s motherhood like after a year? Pretty sh*tty at times. But also wonderful, exhilarating, funny, silly, messy, crazy, loud, beautiful and so much more.

Can’t wait to see what the next few years hold. 

Being mum: 6-9 months

So this post is a little bit late as the girls are now 11 months old as I write this but I wanted to have a bit of a record of this stage they were in as it was quite different to how they are now.

During this stage the girls have still been quite babyish and have been particularly slow with milestones. They were around 9 months old by the time they started to roll both ways which I think is quite late! They also didn’t learn to crawl during this stage which at first I was pretty panicky about but the health visitor told me that its more than likely because we have laminate flooring and they have nothing to grip on to (its funny because as soon as we moved somewhere with carpet they learnt to crawl!!). This stage had me feeling like I was coming out of the fog a little bit.. I started to feel like I could do a lot more and we got a routine down which meant I knew when I was coming and going which made things a lot easier! The girls also became a bit more independent because they were able to sit up on their own and play together which made things a whole heap easier for me!

Being their mum is just one enormous balancing act, one where I can never keep all the plates spinning at once. I think something I have learnt is to just breathe, take a step back and just realise that this isn’t forever. One day I will look back on this time with sadness, nostalgia and probably a few regrets. So its important to make the most of them at every stage!

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Hi, I’m 7 months old today! This month I have smiled lots and lots! I even recognise when people smile at me and smile back! She definitely knows how to charm mummy and daddy with her smile! She adores her mummy and daddy but is definitely a mummy’s girl still! She has found her feet and absolutely loves holding them and playing with them which Margot finds hilarious! She’s doing very well with sitting up and is eating a lot more now! Dotty loves going to sleep cuddling her rabbit and she is very content to just play on her own on the floor! She absolutely loves the jumperoo and bounces sooo hard in it! She’s got a lot more chatty this month too. She always wants whatever toy Margot has got in her hands! She falls asleep with her bunny rabbit comforter and a muslin cloth over her face! She also loves grabbing wipes out of the pack and eating them all! She struggles badly with wind which is pretty much the only time she’s hard work and she is just a complete joy to be around! Dotty you are simply wonderful ❤

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Happy 7 months Margot! Margot has suffered a lot this month with her eczema but is finally starting to get better! She has cut two teeth and is absolutely loving food -she will try and grab any food in your hands! She has found her belly laugh which thankfully we caught on camera… it picks you up whenever you feel down! Margot likes to settle herself and fall asleep on her back whilst playing with her little bunny rabbit but after a while she starts wiggling in her sleep and she needs to be flipped on her tummy like a burger on a bbq! She loves her little mouse rattle and shoves it in to her mouth. She is obsessed with blowing raspberries and getting spittle all over your face! She’s really good at sitting up now and is getting close to crawling! She laughs every time you say the word “dada” but whinges and cries every time she’s put down! Margot you are completely wonderful ❤

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8 MONTHS OLD! Dotty has grown in to the most cheeky and gorgeous wide-mouthed smile. She is constantly giggling and would be content to just lie on the floor and entertain herself, she’s so chilled! She has cut one tooth and another is cutting through so hopefully that’ll make eating easier! She has massive blue eyes which look at everything with wonder and amazement and she has a permenantly shocked expression with her little eyebrows raised! She has also started a little happy scream which is very loud! Her new favourite toy is a cushion which she seems to find hilarious for some reason! She loves rubbing her face on you affectionately and is doing dribbly open mouth kisses. She has a lot of issues with sleep and will cry every time you put her down in her cot no matter how tired she is which makes mummy very guilty! She also hates having her face wiped or touched too much in general. She loves TV especially the fresh prince of bel air theme tune. She always kicks her little legs about and likes rubbing her food all over her sister whilst they’re eating! She’s still a jumperoo queen and will force you to hold her up so she can bounce on your knee until your arms turn to jelly! She’s definitely a people person and will reward just about anyone with a big gummy smile. She’s an absolute delight! Delicious Dotty ❤

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8 MONTHS OLD! Wonderful Margot. Margot has now got two cute little teeth making a gorgeous toothy grin. She loves being tickled it makes her really chuckle. Her sense of humour is really developing and she finds so much funny. Everything in life brings something to laugh at. She still doesn’t particularly like being put down but she’s getting much better at sitting and entertaining herself. She’s started doing a little bum wiggle causing us to think she may be on the move soon (help!!!)! Her hair has grown quite a bit but still doesn’t show up in pictures! She loves her feet and jabbering away at them! If there’s any food in her reach it will be hers and nothing has put her off yet! She buried her face in Daddy’s milkshake this weekend! We think she may have said her first word the other day as she seemed to repeat “ehhhohhh” back to us! She gave us our first lie in the other day and woke up at 9.15am!!! She now says “mumumumumuma” and “bababababa” but they are just sounds at this stage. She is still wary of people so you’re doing well if you get a smile out of her! She sleeps brilliantly and will go down so easily. She gives massive sloppy kisses and even made mummy’s nose bleed with a particularly exuberant kiss! She loves grabbing faces, hair and pretty much anything and she finds hands hilarious for some reason! Margot you are amazing! We love you ❤

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9 months old! Where have the last few months gone?! This month Dotty has learned to roll over and she loves doing so, I often find her in random parts of the room getting in to mischief! She’s desperate to crawl but can’t quite do it, she ends up trying so hard that she gives up and lies on the floor crying! She absolutely loves picking toys up and playing with them and she especially loves having one toy in each hand and smacking them together! She’s always smiling and happy except when someone new comes up to her whilst she’s in the car for some reason! She now says dada and is constantly babbling away to herself. She definitely knows her name but she has also learnt the art of selective hearing! She’s a very, very slow eater and it can take her up to an hour to finish a meal! We often see bits of food in her mouth when the meal is long over. She absolutely loves drinking water and just chugs it down from her cup, she hasn’t quite got the hang of swallowing it though and often ends up coughing and spluttering having too much in her mouth! Dotty is quite intolerant of her brutish sister and will cry at the slightest touch but at other times she finds her really funny! She absolutely loves being thrown about and feeling a bit scared! She’s a delight as ever and we love her so much ❤

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Margot you are now three quarters of a year old! In the world now longer than you were in my tummy! Margot has begun to laugh a lot this past month and finds everything amusing! She can also roll but prefers to be sat up straight. She’s started climbing her cot a bit and using the bars to pull herself up! She’s on medication for her anaemia now which does seem to have made her more chirpy! She tries to drink out of stacking cups now as she’s learnt to drink from a proper cup! She says both “mama” and “dada” and is starting to get some sort of grasp on the meaning of the words! She demands food at meal times and if she wants to move on from a certain item of food she will certainly let you know! She is obsessed with grabbing faces much to Dotty’s disdain. She also tries to shove mummy’s fingers in to her eyeballs when she’s tired! She’s still more reserved with new people but strangers are starting to get more smiles out of her when out and about! She’s also desperate to crawl but not quite there yet. She’s just an absolute joy to be around and we love her so much! ❤

Hi I’m Kate, and I’m a stay at home mum.

“So what are your plans about going back to work?”

I hear this a lot. People don’t think anything of it and nor should they. But for me it’s actually not that simple. For me there’s no “going back” to work because I never actually started working! I mean, I’ve obviously had jobs before when I was at college and uni but as I finished my degree I got pregnant and by the time I’d finished I was already heavily pregnant and had no hope of gaining employment!

So in August the girls were born and the last 10 months have been unbelievably intense. Yes, they would have been sweeter with a bit of maternity pay but I wouldn’t swap our time together for anything. Now the girls are coming up for a year, this would be the time to start looking to go back to work.

I’ve barely left the girls up to now. Other breastfeeding mums out there can vouch for the fact that when you’re breastfeeding, leaving your baby is way more trouble than it’s worth usually (hello lots of pumping, engorgement and leaky boobs!). The thought of putting them in to nursery scares me as they still feel so young to me. However I know they’d thrive with it deep down but the simple fact is I’d have to earn a heck of a lot to even make it worth putting them in childcare. Furthermore, I’d probably want to go back to work part time so I still got lots of time with the girls. I guess flexible hours are a lot easier to negotiate when you’re already employed rather than seeking new employment.

I want to have a career. In fact I never dreamed of having children but I always dreamed of having a career. But I don’t want to put my career above the girls. Right now, though it may seem self involved, I know the girls need me more than anyone. When they’re three years old they’ll go in to funded nursery and when they’re 4 they’ll be in school. I can’t bear to be parted with them so it seems when I add all these factors together that there’s only one option. Being a stay at home mum. 

If I’m honest I used to kinda look down on stay at home mums. That was before I found out just how hard being a parent actually is. Doing it all day every day with no break is relentless, frustrating and monotonous. But it also unbelievably rewarding, enjoyable and fun. The hard times are really, really hard but there are also the really good times of being able to just go out for coffees with people or take your kids for a picnic. The kind of thing you’d miss if you were working. I’m sure if you’re reading this and you’re not a parent you probably think “what is so hard about being a mum?!” Lol, well you just wait! I used to feel the same as you! I used to think being a stay at home mum was such an unfeminist option, so many women fought for the right to work and not have to give it up when they had children. But I see now that feminism is all about having the option to go back to work if you want to, and not if you don’t.

The way I see it is that this time with the girls is so unbelievably precious. It comes around once in a lifetime. Because the girls are twins I already kind of feel like I have half the time with them as it is and I want to treasure the time with them so much! 

I am still only 23, even if I wait 4 years to start working I’ll still be pretty young starting out in my career. I want a proper career that I love and not just settle for something because it’s what fits around nursery schedules! At least this way I haven’t had to have a career break, instead I can start my career in a really good position, knowing my girls are happy and settled!

In the future I may have to miss out on school trips, sports days or class assemblies and that’s why I’ve resolved to drink in these moments with my babies because they won’t last forever.

So no, I’m not going “back to work”. At the moment it’s not what works for our family. But I’ll keep on making my girls’ worlds go round and leave changing the rest of it for a few more years! 

Body image after baby

For the vast majority of my life I have struggled with body image issues.I despised my body and the way it looked at times and felt disgusted when I looked in the mirror.

Before I got pregnant I was in the best state of mind I had ever been in regarding my body. I was confident, comfortable and happy with how I looked, my body no longer felt like my enemy but I embraced it.

When I was pregnant, at first I wasn’t bothered with how I looked. I didn’t even begin showing until around 16 weeks and I carried so small and neatly that many people were shocked that I was having twins. I went on holiday to Italy and I confidently strutted my stuff in my bikini, yes I probably looked a little further a long than I was but other than that I felt pretty good! However, one thing that made me less confident whilst pregnant was the fact that I couldn’t wear stylish clothes and I felt like I constantly looked like a sack of potatoes.

As I got further along with my pregnancy I began to grow larger and larger and felt more and more unhappy in my body. My stomach stretched massively and was covered in stretch marks – by 30 weeks I was the size of a full term pregnant woman and I only got bigger and bigger. I began to pack the pounds on and retain so much water; everything from my legs, arms, face to my lips were completely swollen! By the end of my pregnancy I could barely  move and I felt so grossed out by my body! I couldn’t even fit in to maternity clothes anymore!

When the girls were first born, I felt shocked at how little my body changed. From the cesarean/ IV etc. I was completely swollen and I could not fit in to any of the clothes I’d brought with me. Josh had to go out and get me size 18 clothes to wear. I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin (which was incredibly loose) and I didn’t want any photos to be taken!

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Josh took this photo of me 1 week postpartum. It was the first time I felt comfortable enough for a photo to be taken. Just look at my swollen feet!

I am now six months postpartum. My body should now be fully recovered yet it looks nothing like I thought it would. I guess I knew I wouldn’t look exactly the same but this wasn’t really what I was expecting.

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I am now below the weight I was before I was pregnant – thanks to breastfeeding! Feeding one baby burns 500 calories a day so its more than likely that breastfeeding twins burns 1000! I don’t get out much to do exercise, except for a few speed walks with the pram and the 100s of times a day I run up and down the stairs to put dummies back in etc.! So lets just say my body is not exactly toned. My body looks pretty normal now, thankfully I am back in to my pre-pregnancy clothes – I was grateful for this fact because I couldn’t afford to buy a whole new wardrobe! My stomach, however, is my biggest bug bear. It carried to fairly large babies and stretched beyond belief – lets be honest a woman’s body is designed to carry one baby, not two! My belly now has loose skin, stretch marks and yes a bit of fat on there too! I prefer to keep my stomach covered – so I decided to bare it for the world to see. My body isn’t magazine perfection but it has done something incredible that many people would never be able to do.

If I’m honest, I still struggle with my body. I’d desperately like to feel confident and awesome in myself but I’m not there yet. Some days I look in the mirror and feel proud of what I see, other days I feel a bit grossed out! I am a bridesmaid twice this year and of course that in itself brings trepidation – people looking at you etc! Although I’m sure the brides will be much more interesting. But when you are wearing the same dress as other women you can’t help but feel like you will be compared!

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I guess having a baby, especially two at once changes your body. Of course it will, you have grown human beings inside you. I was three people at once, now I’m back to being one. My body isn’t what it was before, and it never will be again… but I have to accept that. I am me, my body is beautiful. A few months a go, someone on the telly said “having a baby ruins your body” and Josh turned to me and said “I don’t think that is true, your body isn’t ruined!” and that made me stop and think. My body isn’t ruined. My body isn’t something to be upset by, it should be celebrated. I may not be there just yet but one day I  hope I will be!

 

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I hope you enjoyed this post.

Kate-Sig-1

I’ve got a surprise for you…

I found out I was having twins a year a go today. I realised I’d never written an account of how it happened so I decided to write it now!

I was just over 13 weeks pregnant. Our scan was on a Friday morning, so Josh and I decided to go for breakfast beforehand – my morning sickness was starting to ebb away by this point and I could actually keep some food down. As I’ve written about before, finding out about our pregnancy was a struggle. It took me almost three months  to begin coming to terms with the fact that we were going to have a squishy little baby. It was going to be hard work but it was doable. We had planned on taking our little baby on adventures and moulding it in to a mini adventurer. I was convinced we were having a boy!

We walked in to the room where we spoke to a really nice lady. I was desperate for a wee as you have to make sure you drink lots of water beforehand! I lay down on the chair and she squeezed the jelly on to my stomach, it wasn’t cold. I was expecting it to be very cold but they apparently warm it before now! It was dark and Josh and I sat holding hands. The lady turned the screen around to us and put the monitor on my stomach. We saw our baby, she showed us its head, heartbeat and umbilical chord. We looked at each other and tears started to fill our eyes. This little baby was growing inside my tummy! I wasn’t even showing yet and yet there it was kicking and squirming around. The sonographer turned the screen around and started doing lots of clicking and typing. At first we thought it was normal and she was just doing checks, then we started to worry. We started to worry that maybe there was something wrong with the baby and were looking at each other nervously.

After what felt like ages she broke the silence and said “I’ve got a surprise for you….” my heart sank, I suddenly felt this rush of love and nerves all at once. She turned the screen around and said “its twins!”. My reply was “oh sh*t!” – I think that is one of those times when swear words are the only things that are appropriate! We started at each other and laughed in disbelief and the sonographer then began showing us the other baby’s little heartbeat etc. and we were just so shocked! After a little while we walked back in to the waiting room and all we could say was “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe it!”. She brought us out our photos and then we walked out of the hospital in a complete daze, we rang our families and they were so excited and happy! Of course everyone was completely shocked but that was natural.

I’m so thankful for that wonderful day now! Being a twin mum is amazing, crazy, hard, wonderful, incredible!

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Kate-Sig-1

 

Being mum: 4-6 months

So the girls are now half a year old. It seems as though its been so slow and fast at the same time. In my last update I spoke about my fears of 4 month sleep regression – let me tell you it hit us hard! We struggled for weeks and weeks and the sleep deprivation really got to us but eventually we got through it!

People also told us at the 4 month mark it would get easier and really it actually did. One of the things that made things slightly easier was buying a jumperoo second hand. Margot had really been struggling being independent and she absolutely loved playing in it which gave her more independence! The girls have also started going around 2.5 – 3 hours between milk feeds now which has definitely made it easier for me. They have also started on solid foods and we are doing baby led weaning which is fun but very messy! We have been getting out to more groups and tend to get out almost every day and we have started to walk to town and to tesco. We are getting so much more out of the girls now and their personalities are really starting to shine. They are so different to one another which is really interesting.

Being their mum in this time has been a complete and utter joy. Yes, it’s been difficult still. I’m not sure being a mum is ever going to be easy – especially being a mum of twins! The days are long but I’m trying to soak in every last moment because one day they won’t be all small and squishy anymore and I’ll be desperate for these times back!

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Our little Dotty is 5 months old today. I can’t believe how much she has developed in the last month… unfortunately she’s had a cold for the whole of it and is becoming known as “snotty Dotty” 🙊. Her favourite toy is still her hands and she also is partial to playing with a muslin cloth.. no matter how much mummy tries to persuade her to play with actual toys! She’s still very content to sit in her chair and spectate and this was what she did during her Christmas dinner! She has a really soft, sweet little voice and loves talking to people. She seems to have been teething for a while and constantly chewing her fingers though we have no teeth yet. Night times are hard with Dotty as she wakes up and is hard to settle back to sleep. She often ends up in mummy and daddy’s bed! She’s had her first time on an aeroplane and laughed the whole time. She’s starting to get a bit anxious around people she doesn’t know and she really likes holding her mummy and daddy’s hands. This month she also went to work with daddy and met all the people there! She has waved and rolled over from front to back and tummy time is now easy peasy for her. She is such a delight and we are so blessed to have her lovely little self!

 

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5 months of Margot. This month Margot has become quite the chatterbox and her vocabulary has now come to include screaming and shrieking (in joy)! She wakes up in such a good mood and is so happy to see her family! She’s finally starting to go 2 hours between feeds (only 3 months late!!) however she’s recently started being more wakeful in the night! She’s also becoming more independent thanks to the jumperoo which she loves and she also loves grabbing things and putting them in her mouth! She can now sit up on her own but flops down after a few seconds! She loves being played with and enjoys splashing in the bath! She has recently started to cry every time you put her down to sleep but soon settles. She now has 2-3 shorter naps during the day rather than one long one and she’s much less cranky! Margot is becoming even more of a joy to be around and we love watching her grow

 

 

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Half a year old! Dotty has come on in leaps and bounds this month … she can sit up for a few seconds at a time and as she still dislikes tummy time she will roll over on to her back straight away! She is either an absolute joy to be around or a right whinge bag! She is definitely a mummy’s girl and does not like it if mummy is not in her line of sight! She likes food too but can take or leave it… she gets very frustrated when she can’t get it in to her mouth and flaps her arm around in anger! She also enjoys clawing at faces and hair! She loves holding fabric either muslin cloths or blankets and has to sleep with her comforter over her face (meaning I’m constantly checking she’s not suffocating 😂). She loves playing with her daddy but he also knows exactly how to wind her up! She accidently said her first word “wiggle” this month and when she has her dummy in she constantly says “wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle”! They have both started sleeping in their own room and in separate cots but they’re pushed together so they can still be close! She’s quite laid back and a little lazy which is why she’s not usually the first to do things! Happy half birthday Dotty we love you so much

 

20170214_112150Happy half birthday my little nugget! (It was actually on Saturday but we were away and I did think to bring their cards!). Margot has now been abroad and is becoming a good little traveller, she is happy to sleep anywhere as long as she’s on her tummy! When she wakes up she does a little baby push up and looks around and once she spots you she has the most smiley face! This month she has suddenly started using a dummy and is kind of sleeping through the night but she stirs a lot for comfort. The loves grabbing and clawing at faces and shoving whatever she can in her mouth! She’s in love with food and will devour it within seconds (mostly smushing it all over her face). She loves playing with Daddy and he can make her giggle the most. She is still a milk fiend but can go longer between feeds if necessary. Margot loves chatting and discovering different pitches and decibels! She can sit up on her own for a few seconds and is desperately trying to crawl but she’s not quite there yet. She’s in 6-9 month clothing but it’s still quite baggy. We are so in love with you Margot!

 

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Barcelona with the babies

Last weekend we took the girlies on their first trip abroad! On Friday morning we headed over to Manchester airport and flew to Barcelona, Spain.

As we’d already travelled to Cornwall on a plane we had some idea as to how the airport would go and we were a bit more prepared!

I’m thinking of writing a blog on some tips about travelling with a baby/ babies/ twins and how we managed it. Let me know if you would like to read it!

We arrived at Barcelona and I foolishly was rushing to get off the plane and left my phone in the seat pocket! Thankfully I managed to get it back on our way home!

We eventually got a taxi and headed to our Air BnB. We were met by our host and we had a look round our apartment – we loved it. Josh headed out to get some supplies and by that time it was the girls’ bedtime so we settled in for the night.

The next morning we had a lazy morning with the girls, unfortunately it took us ages to get out of the apartment! Eventually we got out and went to La Sagrada Familia and did a bit of exploring round the area. Then we went and got a bit of food and headed back to the apartment to top the girls’ bellies up!

By this point we desperately wanted to see more sights but we had yet to have lunch and it was really late in the day. We decided to walk in to the centre via the Arc de Triomf to find a restaurant but after a lot of searching we just couldn’t find it! We ended up in a rubbish all you can eat place which we weren’t really happy with but by that time we were just so hungry! After that we headed back to the apartment to get the girls to bed.

So that’s the first two days of our trip! I’m going to write a separate post for days 3 & 4!

Hope you enjoyed it.

 

Kate-Sig-1